Quest of an Agnostic Mind

Whenever I persuasively make a concerted and sincere attempt to bring back my faith in the God and ask him / her to be on my side forever, subtly the conscience surfaces a question for me, “Why can’t the God be on the sides of other people? Is it just because my yearning / seeking is the most effective?” At that point, on the other side, I have a strong faith that the God is Creator of the Grand Design of this Universe and is also Governing it in the most systematic manner. Doesn’t this mean, after all even the effectiveness of an individual’s longing / prayer is also being regulated by the Almighty himself / herself?

Then I shift my loyalty of faith to the Sub - Conscious Mind, again a whimsical concept as I may neither be courageous enough nor willing to pay the cost to shift this loyalty to Self - Confidence.

But it could also be possible that the derived faith in Sub - Conscious and the faith in Self - Confidence is the direct offshoot of the faith in God itself. May be!!! I don’t know.